It's got to be faith

Faith does strange things to strange constituencies. Take the example of karva chauth, the festival in which Hindu wives keep a rigorous fast for the long life of their respective husbands.

Women from all walks of life and of most shades of opinion keep this fast once a year. Strangely, most of these urban, educated and professional women openly say the fast is not just sexist but also utterly regressive. They agree in drawing room discussions that the story that one needs to recite is so anti-woman that even eternal doormats would squirm. Yet, they all keep the fast.

"It is a matter of faith you see," says one of the karva chauth ladies who have not just cooked the whole day for their husbands but also visited the parlour to do themselves up, gone shopping, sat up till 3 am to get their mehndi done and have also not drank a drop of water to top it all. This lady, in normal life, is the CEO of a stock broking firm and can give the men a run for their money in her sphere of work.

Sitting on a roadside stool getting mehndi on her hands and feet, she casually discusses with you about the market turmoil and the impact on her business. And, between castigating the mehndiwallah for messing up a pattern, she also advises you what you need to do with your shares.

Then there is another constituency. That of the younger, unmarried generation which has, thanks to BPO jobs, quite a lot of money at hand to spare for these indulgences. Of course, the vrat is for married women but over the years it has become a fad among the living-in and the boyfriend-girlfriend generation.

A colleague told me that her hostel roommates were all keeping the fast and particularly mentioned one of them who has kept the fast for five different boys. "She keeps it for all her boyfriends even though they eventually leave her. This time, it is for her latest one who is barely a week old into the relationship," she said.

Well, so much for the restless population. Then there are the traditionals too, those ones who guide you through the forgotten maze of rituals in a modern consumeristic world. They tell you whatever karva you get for howsoever much of money, a traditional terracotta one is must. For the puja thali, you could go to a mall and come back with an exquisite looking thing, but the chandi thaal that your saas and hersaas did the puja in is must.

But the most stunning of constituencies are the growing number of men who keep this fast too! And the place they come from is even more amazing. Some are techies, others doctors yet others MNC topshots. I personally know of a marketing CEO who has kept this karva chauth fast for 18 years of his marriage. "I have always kept it," he says.

This syndrome has nothing to do with modern should-to-shoulder syndrome or even love for their wives. "I did so in the first year of my marriage to make my wife feel good and have not been able to make her feel bad ever since," says another man who, of course, does not want to be identified under any circumstances.

Such is the power of faith. It can draw the toughest of feminists, thinkers and opinion-makers into its fold.

Is that good or bad? One is yet to come to a conclusion but festivals like karva chauth provide that much welcome break from urban monotony. It gives you time away from routine and thus reduces stress in a much bigger way than perhaps drugs can. It gives you time to think over your relationships if they are going bad and cement them further if they are on track.

Of course, the next day dawns and you are again the same old couple who has to battle ahead of what life interjects from time to time in your sagging veins.

Published in The Sunday Pioneer, October 19,2008 http://www.dailypioneer.com/128599/Its-got-to-be-faith.html